There may be people who may read this; who knowingly or unknowingly may be looking to see if this is a critical piece. That is not the nature of this writing. It’s simply about a personal experience that clearly shaped my walk with God.
When I was younger and not walking close with God; I had an enlightening experience. It was what my friend Rose calls a “defining moment.”
I always had two or three jobs even when I had a good job. We had moved into a new house and the financial needs became more demanding. I needed to be able to work at home and still earn extra monies. It so happened that an opportunity arose that allowed me to make money and a lot of it writing meaningful greetings cards and I leaped at the challenge.
I had written poetry for many years; all of my life in fact. When we were newly married in the middle of the night; something would wake me up and whisper poetry in my ears and I would jump up and write it down. When I became convinced that it could wait til morning, I would later find that it couldn’t, it would be long forgotten. All I knew was that it was beautiful. So I ended up with a huge stack of poetry in a bin from these nightly writings. My husband and I even thought of putting a computer in the bedroom for my nightly writings but we decided against it.
THINGS HAPPEN TO BELIEVERS
I knew the Lord as a little child. I am very thankful. I know that this doesn’t happen to everyone. God is love. I knew this as a child, but something happens to believers as we live in this world. I became sensitive to all of the unbelief that surrounded me in the wrong way. In my poems, Gods’ name would just pop up. Or Jesus name would just pop up. I really couldn’t explain it but they would be in the writings and nothing else would go there. I could be writing on anything, any subject and God’s name, His hand was always in it.
I GOT THIS JOB OFFER
I heard about a place that paid for your poetry if they could convert it into Greeting cards. I began to do some research and wrote a stack of materials. I went to the business and met the owner. I literally spent the entire afternoon there. I don’t recall her name and honestly I wouldn’t say it if I did. The lady paid me extremely well and promised me that she would give me a byline on the back of the Greeting Cards that were published. She then gave me a very large assignment. I was so excited.
THEN THE BOOM FELL…
This is a true story. As I was leaving she said: “One small thing. You mention God in your poetry, can you just leave that out? I usually don’t accept writings with Gods’ name in it but you didn’t have it in there a lot; but can you just do it less?”
She explained that she was an atheist. Now I had never met an atheist before. I couldn’t even understand how someone could have that mindset. I was shocked. I remember thinking how I couldn’t tell by looking at her. That was the most alarming thing.
I went numb. Those “visions of sugarplums” danced right out of my head. I just said the expected good-byes. For some reason I had parked a very long ways from the business. The walk back to my car was way too long. I was overcome with great sadness. I knew in my spirit that I could never return. I could not compromise my faith.
I am very proud, because I wasn’t walking close with God then. There comes a time when we will all face DEFINING MOMENTS; what will you do then? What choice will you make?